August 8th, 2020An Aussie in America

ONE of the many facts about the modern world that I don’t understand is the existence of people who make their living as influencers.
What I want to know is, how can influencer be a job when it’s not even a proper word?
But you know what? A story in Wired magazine in 2019 mentioned a person named Luka Sabbat, who apparently has two million followers on Instagram and “can charge upwards of $US40,000 to promote products” – promote being another way of saying he tries to influence people to use certain products.
Closer to home, young Australian fitness guru Kayla Itsines in 2016 was proclaimed by Time magazine to be “one of the top 30 Most Influential People on the Internet”, and, according to Wikipedia, by 2018 had turned that influence into a multimillion-dollar fortune. She’s said to have more than eight million Facebook followers and about six million followers on Instagram.
I guess that makes her an influencer.
I remember, as a kid, hearing a lot about something called peer pressure, usually related to doing something you shouldn’t, such as smoking cigarettes or drinking booze. Most baby boomers at one time or another were probably admonished by their parents, something like, “If Jimmy jumps off the roof, does that mean you have to jump off the roof?” (Answer: uh, yes.)
Jimmy must have been an influencer, ahead of his time.
Now, Kayla Itsines might have eight million Facebook followers but I’m closing in. Maybe. Are followers the same as Facebook friends? Because I have more than 500 friends, probably as many as 10 or so who occasionally show interest in what I’ve posted.
Some time ago on my Facebook page I posted about an event that returned Australia to the world stage (it’s been on the map for quite some time, with or without Tasmania).
What happened was, I saw an advertisement on television announcing the “New ‘World of Wiener’ Hot Dogs Arrive at Wienerschnitzel”.
What’s Wienerschnitzel, you ask? It’s a typically American fast-food chain, with stores in several states – and Guam, in the western Pacific Ocean – that claims to sell more than 120 million hot dogs a year. But none in Australia.
Don’t worry if you haven’t heard of Wienerschnitzel, because it has heard of you.
Here’s the thing. The “World of Wiener” varieties include (I’m quoting the company website here):
“The Cuban – A hot dog with a pickle spear, Swiss cheese [a typical Cuban condiment], and Cuban mustard (basically, it’s the hot dog version of a Cuban sandwich).
“The German – A hot dog topped with sauerkraut and beer mustard.
“The Aussie – A hot dog with horseradish aioli, bacon, cheese, grilled onions, and jalapenos.”
Yep, that’s correct, folks. Wienerschnitzel sells hot dogs branded as “Aussie”, which feature Mexican chilli peppers and a sauce that originated in the Mediterranean region, and American-style processed cheese. I’m OK with the grilled onions and bacon.
I don’t know if I was infuriated or just deeply confused about this so-called “Aussie” hot dog, so I took to Facebook and vented.
It’s ridiculous, a travesty, an insult to our national pride, I might have said (it was several weeks ago – who can remember?).
A surprising number of my “friends”, sensing my pain, responded. I must say, quite a lively discussion ensued, largely centred on the sanctity of the Bunnings sausage sizzle (grilled onions, yes or no; barbeque sauce or tomato sauce or both; etc).
No one was impressed by this so-called “Aussie” hot dog.
So anyway, a few days ago the hot dog chain ran a new ad on TV, in which a young actor in a Wienerschnitzel uniform, and a person dressed as a two-metre-tall hot dog, re-enacted the naming of these “World of Wiener” varieties.
How it went was, to choose the countries that would be accorded bespoke weenies, the giant hot dog threw darts into a world map tacked to a wall. But being encased in a huge bun didn’t allow the giant hot dog much manual dexterity and the third dart wildly missed the map altogether, so the kid in the Wienerschnitzel uniform randomly jabbed it into Australia!
This new ad came not long after my Facebook campaign in which I expressed my disgust at Wienerschnitzel’s heinous degradation of Australian cuisine.
Turns out, it wasn’t intentional, and this new ad can easily be regarded as an apology.
Does that make me an influencer? You be the judge.