August 17th, 2017The Local supports Marriage Equality

Marriage Equality because Love is Love

LOU McLachlan and Deb Clarke have known each other for nine years and two years ago got engaged in Paris – with matching rings from Tiffany’s. As you do! Two years later the pair, who live in Mollongghip, are still waiting to get married.
Lou, who runs Daylesford’s Secret Garden, said it wasn’t until she met her soul-mate that marriage became important to her. But after the “beautiful moment” of their engagement they decided it was the inevitable next step – in Australia.
“A lot of people, and let’s say straight people, say, ‘Why don’t you go to New Zealand or America (to get married)’ but why would you go overseas to get married when it would not be acknowledged in our own country?”
Lou, pictured on the left with Deb, said her father called a few weeks back and told her the Liberal Party was about to vote for marriage equality and that he was sure she and Deb would be married by Christmas.

“I told him not to get me excited but it would have been perfect because Deb’s brother and his husband, who just recently married in LA, were coming over, so we started thinking about where to get married, home or maybe the Convent (Gallery), then two weeks later they (the Liberal Party) had that cabinet meeting.
“Next, they were saying they were going to do a non-binding, voluntary postal vote and I thought ‘where does that leave us?’. I was really upset, it hit me in the heart, and I also furious at the lack of leadership. You don’t take a minority and then hang them out to dry with the general public with the bigotry and ignorance. The role of leaders is to lead the way – it’s a human rights issue more than anything.
“The impact on me was that I was really excited to be going to have a consensus, which in a community creates a context, so I can say ‘this is my wife, we were just married’. At the moment, I never introduce Deb as my fiancée, we suppress that because there is no consensus.
“What gay marriage would mean to me is the safety of speaking into an agreement, an agreement that has been passed and if people still don’t understand, it doesn’t matter because it is the law. But there is no law, we are still swimming, we are not acknowledged and our love is not acknowledged as equal. The job for our leaders was to create that context and then it just disappeared again.”
Deb said she felt gays and lesbians were not considered human beings. “But we love the same way, we hurt the same way…why are we discriminated against for that. If Ireland of all places, one of the most Catholic places in the world can have gay marriage, where the hell is Australia?
“I went to my brother’s wedding in America and they just couldn’t believe we couldn’t marry here, that we were still waiting. You don’t choose to be born gay, you are born that way, the same as you are born with blonde hair or blue eyes. This is the same as the women’s vote, the black vote, it’s the same struggle. You have to prove you are human beings first and have the same rights as everyone else. We were the first country to get women’s votes and we are the last for same sex marriage.”
Deb, who works with Ambulance Victoria, said it was also important for children growing up gay to see good role models and acceptance. “There are a lot of young males hanging themselves and they need to see support in rural areas.
“We need to think how does this affect our youth – it’s time for Australia to wake up and see what’s happening.”
Two weeks ago, Lou and Deb took their story to Daylesford’s main street to ask shopkeepers and businesses to fly rainbow flags or place leaflets in their windows promoting marriage equality. From 11am to 5pm they went in and out of every business they could find “and there were only two that turned us down”.
“We thought how can we raise people’s consciousness – although I think Daylesford already has the highest regional gay population and it’s really built on the shoulders of that with its colour and expression and creativity in this town. It was a long day and I was spent, but when I came back up the street and saw the flags flying outside the Daylesford Hotel I felt quite emotional,” Lou said.
“Both Deb and I have come a long way to feel really comfortable being gay, and now I love having a beautiful woman who is going to be my wife, but I am 50 and it has taken that long to get a sense of self. This (the plebiscite) is like throwing a spanner in the works and bringing up all those emotions we have gone through to get here.
“It is easy really. If people are confused, or say they don’t care, they are either coming from love or fear. If they are coming from love there is nothing to fear, if they are coming from fear, then those feelings are unfounded.
“We just hope people vote yes.”

Words: Donna Kelly | Image: Kyle Barnes

Just sayin’…
By Donna Kelly

AS I watch more and more rainbow flags appear around the region, I feel hopeful that people will vote yes, in this stupid plebiscite – and then the politicians will vote yes, in their stupid parliament.
It just beggars belief that we are spending $120 million, or more, on a postal vote, and that vote has no legal standing. Why do we vote in politicians? Surely it is up to them to show some leadership and just make marriage equality happen.
And I hope the issue, which hasn’t even got to the voting stage (but if you failed to enrol by last Thursday, you don’t have a say anyway), doesn’t divide the nation. Already there has been plenty which has shocked people – maybe especially those of us who live in this wonderful bit of a bubble where equality already pretty much reigns.
Mind you, I am from Frankston, and was pretty rapt to see it was the first town/city to officially hoist the rainbow flag. Daylesford followed suit and last week Trentham also managed to find the keys to the flagpole (don’t ask) in the town square and do the same thing. Well done Mel for making it happen!
Meanwhile plenty of businesses are flying their own flags, or stickers, or leaflets, asking people to vote yes. I mean, if you come up this way and have a problem with marriage equality you are probably in the wrong place.
Anyway, there’s a lot being spread around on this so here are some nuts and bolts just for the record.
At the moment the plebiscite faces two High Court challenges, which will be heard on September 5 and 6. One case has been brought forward by the Human Rights Law Centre, representing Australian Marriage Equality and Greens Senator Janet Rice. The other case is from the Public Interest Advocacy Centre, representing Andrew Wilkie MP, Felicity Marlowe and Friends and Parents of Lesbians and Gays Brisbane.
If they don’t get up the Australian Bureau of Statistics will start sending out surveys over a two-week period from September 12. You can ask for a replacement if something goes awry but requests will only be accepted until October 11. The survey form asks only one question: “Should the law be changed to allow same-sex couples to marry?”.
Voters are being encouraged to post their forms back, in the reply paid envelope, by October 27. Responses received after November 7 won’t be processed. Legally, you don’t have to vote.
The result will be published on the ABS website on November 15. The postal survey is not binding so politicians can still vote against legalising same-sex marriage even if a majority of people vote yes. PM Malcolm Turnbull reckons the pollies will abide by the vote. Hmmm.
More questions? The Australian Marriage Law Survey Information Line is open seven days a week, 8am to 8pm. Call 1800 572 11.
But let’s vote yes and move on. Just sayin’…